tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3915113069723845995.post906208945403797172..comments2024-03-04T08:15:23.887-06:00Comments on JOYFUL REFLECTIONS: Can we Agree to Disagree?????Betsy Banks Adamshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16223591156634767330noreply@blogger.comBlogger64125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3915113069723845995.post-74382341900558492502009-09-17T11:37:52.402-05:002009-09-17T11:37:52.402-05:00There are some people that if you say the sun is s...There are some people that if you say the sun is shining, they will say it is raining.<br /><br />You can't always avoid crazy people but you can sure avoid letting them control your thoughts and actions.<br /><br />We run into people like this in real life and on blogs. My thoughts are, I am so happy I don't have to live with these people. Whoo hoo! And I move on to something happy.aurbiehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04234712574405718245noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3915113069723845995.post-52820924684614124412009-09-15T21:08:57.701-05:002009-09-15T21:08:57.701-05:00Betsy, I've been absent from the blogging worl...Betsy, I've been absent from the blogging world for over a week, but the title of this post caught my eye as I was trying to catch up. <br /><br />I think you are right that some people feel a certain degree of freedom to type away the things they wouldn't dare to say in person. And I've often worried about how someone might perceive a comment in print without being able to hear the tone and inflection that I hear as I write.<br /><br />Here's hoping you have many more joyful interactions with bloggers in the future!<br />AdrienneAdrienne Zwarthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15399915534602362046noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3915113069723845995.post-37974854643729968362009-09-15T19:51:50.510-05:002009-09-15T19:51:50.510-05:00PS I meant to add that no one has a right to atta...PS I meant to add that no one has a right to attack anyone. That person should be ashamed. They obviously don't know you and your sweetness at all. Hang in there and try to let it go. xoRosahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12032001920106167026noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3915113069723845995.post-68108620321737866842009-09-15T18:08:16.904-05:002009-09-15T18:08:16.904-05:00Hi Betsy,
I think sometimes people forget that a b...Hi Betsy,<br />I think sometimes people forget that a blog is a personal journal of people's thoughts and feelings - they can't be wrong. And when they allow comments - as long as someone makes them respectfully - they are allowed to place their opinion too. Anyways, my heart aches for you. I think you know I got attacked for a post on my birding blog - and to the point where they got the Michigan Audubon Society's director to contact me. I cannot tell you how angry that made me. So I empathize with you - and you are allowed to have an opinion. Don't let anyone bully you. (IF they do, let me know and I'll TALK to them! tee hee!)<br />Love,<br />SHelleyShelleyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17534904024320623895noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3915113069723845995.post-17003252720021564932009-09-15T15:15:27.979-05:002009-09-15T15:15:27.979-05:00hmmm, unfortunately,there are people who's onl...hmmm, unfortunately,there are people who's only opinion that matters are theirs. don't dwell on those kind, they are not worth your precious time..Salitypehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09616977743381736756noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3915113069723845995.post-50285614201274247592009-09-15T15:12:23.825-05:002009-09-15T15:12:23.825-05:00Well I can't help saying it Betsy, but I truly...Well I can't help saying it Betsy, but I truly am sorry you were personally attacked on this one. When I grew up my Dad always used to say, "Young ladies do not talk about religion, sports or politics. Young ladies just don't do that." That old Victorian feeling puts the breaks on a lot of my opinions to this day. I still feel very uncomfortable expressing them on those subjects. I married into a family who expressed their opinions freely and quite heatedly on just about EVERYTHING, but never with malice thank God because they truly loved the debate. However, to this day and because of my dear beloved father's own Victorian upbringing about the way young ladies 'should behave', I still feel uncomfortable about expressing my opinions. In some ways I feel that I should get over it but things you learn from the very beginning of your life are hard to 'get over'. I saw often enough the ill feeling they caused between my family members. So I became a great observer and you only have to look on the roads to see the occasional rage issues people have and with that attitude, put it into the context of anonymity, Pandora's box has been well and truly opened. People let rip without fear of being bopped on the nose. The headlines lately are full of it. Graciousness and politeness, kindness even, seem to be a dying art, but I am going to do my best to keep it alive and well in this family at least, and it does after all start in the home. Good grief! Have I just expressed an opinion? Well, it wasn't about religion, politics or sports so I guess I am okay and yes, I am saying all that tongue in cheek. Sorry for the long ramble. Happy blogging my friend, let's hope certain people will be a little kinder when they find you have an opinion different to theirs.DeniseinVAhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08494518513936310345noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3915113069723845995.post-12002056137629724302009-09-15T14:25:29.980-05:002009-09-15T14:25:29.980-05:00Betsy, you are a special and dear person. Never ch...Betsy, you are a special and dear person. Never change, we love you as you are. Good on you for "turning the other cheek" (here in this post) Do you think the slanderer has read your blog and all the comments today? (((Hugs))) JoJohttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11666316882168582862noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3915113069723845995.post-10279258028841189972009-09-15T12:32:38.224-05:002009-09-15T12:32:38.224-05:00Yes, we all have those moments when we have to let...Yes, we all have those moments when we have to let go on our own blog. Whenever I write a "controversial" piece, I'm always ready for a fight. As I've seen them out there. But, as I have learned over the years in the blogging community, but much more in life itself, if you don't have something nice to say, don't say it at all. Walk away. If I don't agree with someone, I just click off and move on. As you said, we are ALL entitled to our opinions. For some reason, the written word is taken to heart a lot more. As I said, I have been lucky that most of my blogging friends are courteous in that respect. If they agree, they say so. If they disagree, they just click off and come back later when I've changed my mood. lol You live and learn. xoRosahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12032001920106167026noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3915113069723845995.post-76340422923927325822009-09-15T08:46:52.920-05:002009-09-15T08:46:52.920-05:00Looks like you hit a nerve with this one given all...Looks like you hit a nerve with this one given all the lengthy comments. I'm arriving late but figured I'd add my two cents ... just because. Mostly I blog for fun and tend to avoid controversial topics, but occasionally something arises I feel compelled to address. When commenting on the blogs of others, I try to keep 'the golden rule' in mind and choose my words carefully, realizing the printed text is easily misunderstood because there are no other 'cues' to clarify intent. I choose to believe that we're each doing the best we can in any given moment and I try not to give (or take) offense. As Don Miguel Ruiz wrote in THE FOUR AGREEMENTS, being 'impeccable' with your word, making no assumptions and taking nothing personally DOES make life simpler ... even though doing so is often quite challenging.<br />Hugs and blessings,storytellerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14101550406171982090noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3915113069723845995.post-62419049203192066802009-09-15T07:50:03.418-05:002009-09-15T07:50:03.418-05:00Offering opinions always sets us up to be attacked...Offering opinions always sets us up to be attacked by someone with a really strong one and no control. It is never "right" to hurt other people, no matter how strongly we feel about something. If we don't agree, we can say so politely and express why. Personal attackes have no part of an argument. Shouting is never necessary. I recently had someone accuse both Mike and I of "yelling at her"...we were all discussing something mutually and I do have a tencency to get loud sometimes because I'm hard to hearing and don't realize my voice is loud. I had no idea that she felt I was yelling until she said so, but instead of just asking me to talk more quietly, she attacked me and called me a couple of names that hurt. Even though we have more or less gotten beyond this, the name calling is still sitting there in my subconcious hurting me. One of the best quotes I ever saw says: "We treat the damage we do with our lips very lightly because we do not see the corpses we leave behind." No wonder the Bible talks a lot about "taming the tongue"....we all need to see our words on a screen in front of us before we say them out loud. As far as offering opinions goes....with some people you just can't. They only will accept their own.Maryhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02890796903959709429noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3915113069723845995.post-50233933054017417312009-09-15T03:46:47.125-05:002009-09-15T03:46:47.125-05:00While I might sit on the fence to listen to all th...While I might sit on the fence to listen to all the sides I am very opinionated. But I do like to have all the facts before getting into a discussion. Here in the blogging universe I try to stay away from controversial subjects, mainly religion and politics. <br /><br />I have seen a few "discussions" on other blogs, seen but not joined. And from what I have seen most of the bullies tend to be very close minded. There is no possibility of having a friendly conversation with people like this once they have made up their minds. If everyone else does not come around to their way of thinking then the name calling and insults begin.<br /><br />I guess I really don't have any advice just observations. But if you want a good discussion on politics or whatever we can give it a go and I'll still love ya after the dust settles.<br /><br />Hugs,<br />JudySquirrelQueenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00634513897599275287noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3915113069723845995.post-44118958964088731542009-09-14T20:49:06.183-05:002009-09-14T20:49:06.183-05:00Hi Betsy - so sorry you've been through this. ...Hi Betsy - so sorry you've been through this. It seems a lot of people believe in free speech only if your opinion agrees with theirs. I'm sorry they made a personal attack on you, but you just have to consider the source I guess. Whether in politics or personal life, it's hard to learn to fight fair. To be able to stand toe to toe with someone and argue at the top of your voice (or blog voice) and not take it personal is difficult. To be able to say I love you; I respect you, but I don't agree with your opinion is much harder than riding the fence or keeping quiet. I know - being a fence rider myself! I, too, have strong opinions, but tend to keep them to myself. There are a lot of brave men and women that fought hard and continue to fight for our freedom and right to speak that opinion. Don't let a blogger's attack keep you from speaking your mind!Margehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02687426202666732967noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3915113069723845995.post-72024132960685894212009-09-14T20:30:42.358-05:002009-09-14T20:30:42.358-05:00It makes life interesting to have different opinio...It makes life interesting to have different opinions. Who'd want to agree all the time? Nothing would ever get changed.<br /><br />Anyway - I think if you put your opinion down just as you have in this post "my opinion only" it makes it plain and clear that this is where YOU are coming from. And does nothing to take away from the other person's point of view.<br /><br />If the other person then gets angry or mean - well, that is their problem. You have just stated an opinion. You didn't tell that person they were wrong, or foolish, or horrible or whatever. You just said how you feel. <br /><br />And please do continue to give us (your loyal readers) your true opinion. I love this site. I learn from you. And I'm soooooo glad this is a joyful blog - that you and hubby are happy. <br /><br />I stay away from hot topics too, simply because I have found out the hard way (haven't we all) that email or blog comments can be misinterpreted. So, better to have a face to face discussion where somebody can right away say "oh, did you mean.....?"<br /><br />All this to say Besty - we love you! I love your blog. I enjoy reading your posts. And your opinions count! (oh, and you don't have a mean bone in your body. I can't see you hurting anybody!)<br />Hugs,Wendyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14788733654505792266noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3915113069723845995.post-52045724907858211142009-09-14T20:15:57.258-05:002009-09-14T20:15:57.258-05:00I'm upset by much of the nasty discourse we se...I'm upset by much of the nasty discourse we see in today's politics, which is one reason I don't express my political feelings online. I'll settle for a letter to my congressmen instead.Janiehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06509431336916594990noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3915113069723845995.post-55238124378223895682009-09-14T20:12:09.225-05:002009-09-14T20:12:09.225-05:00Betsy, you have hit spot on the very reason I fear...Betsy, you have hit spot on the very reason I fear the direction communication is going in schools, work, and in other relationships. We are all so glued to electronics that we barely know how to talk with one another. And in writing we perceive things differently from what they are.NCmountainwomanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00615765649828716560noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3915113069723845995.post-14250224902238452732009-09-14T20:04:24.355-05:002009-09-14T20:04:24.355-05:00Sadly Betsy, there are a lot of haters out there, ...Sadly Betsy, there are a lot of haters out there, who don't conform to your high standard of civility and good cheer. Don't let them change who you are, and yes, it's important for us to have opinions, and also be receptive of others. But let's face it, and I'll be the first to defend you: you're most always right! But that's just my opinion.Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17989947946488835186noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3915113069723845995.post-52799447796763558122009-09-14T19:58:14.106-05:002009-09-14T19:58:14.106-05:00Betsy, remain as you are. I have gotten nothing bu...Betsy, remain as you are. I have gotten nothing but enjoyment from your blog.<br />I cannot believe that some angry soul had to vent his/her anger at you for voicing your opinion. That's exactly what most people do is voice their opinion. That is what we have the freedom to do.Lolanoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3915113069723845995.post-55213654682468704352009-09-14T18:57:29.259-05:002009-09-14T18:57:29.259-05:00I agree with your post and what the others had to ...I agree with your post and what the others had to say. It is your right to express your views. I will defend your right to do so my friend. <br /><br /> I get so much joy from visiting you. Your blog is filled with beauty. Keep on post all the love for us...hugs...m...Mary Isabella and Kiley too!https://www.blogger.com/profile/03370938632028789596noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3915113069723845995.post-29932180815880536392009-09-14T18:43:28.894-05:002009-09-14T18:43:28.894-05:00Betsy I am drawn to your blog as it is a breath of...Betsy I am drawn to your blog as it is a breath of fresh air! Seriously, it is so nice to read "nice things" as I have found in blog-land, in the blogs I enjoy and follow, and it is almost an escape from the day to day world to me. I write what I feel and if it offends someone, well, then don't read it! Seriously, I believe there are people out there who are just angry people who get a kick out of saying and doing "mean things". As someone told me when I was small "don't say anything unless you can say something nice" or something to that effect. I guess what I mean about all this is no one has to "attack" another, just be polite and respectful and remember that you are a visitor to the blog!Cherylhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07360476402810561433noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3915113069723845995.post-35657432202099623762009-09-14T17:35:31.301-05:002009-09-14T17:35:31.301-05:00I've posted on political forums many times so ...I've posted on political forums many times so I know how people are, especially when it comes to politics and religion. I've been call a racist because I disagree with a lot of Obama's policies when, if fact, I don't give a hoot what color his skin is. It doesn't bother me at all because I think it shows just how small and intolerant the person is. Besides that, I don't really give a hoot what that person thinks of me.Nealhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05153009268038849033noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3915113069723845995.post-41955175953615631112009-09-14T16:49:45.436-05:002009-09-14T16:49:45.436-05:00Betsy, Its the teacher in you to want to sit on th...Betsy, Its the teacher in you to want to sit on the fence and hear all sides before finding a solution to a problem..a very nice characteristic indeed..but some times its, also, just best to "consider the source" of those mean words and let it be!! Smile girl..there are tons of followers who love your style. :-)Tinahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17717015543939819841noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3915113069723845995.post-32741810336067624432009-09-14T15:45:28.160-05:002009-09-14T15:45:28.160-05:00Dear Betsy:
I try to keep my blog off of hot butt...Dear Betsy:<br /><br />I try to keep my blog off of hot button issues, too. <br /><br />I do, however, frequent a couple of blogs which occasionally have strong political/social/religious stands that I don't agree with. I visit them because I enjoy the rest of the blog content.<br /><br /><br />I have never seen anyone's mind changed by rude comments. TO me, it's a sure-fire way to get me to stop listening to someone's opinion.FIONAhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00525085661198210325noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3915113069723845995.post-88052297468298868022009-09-14T15:23:28.986-05:002009-09-14T15:23:28.986-05:00Hello Betsy,
I'll begin my reply with this qu...Hello Betsy,<br /><br />I'll begin my reply with this quote:<br />-----------------------------------<br />If the freedom of speech<br /> is taken away<br />then dumb and silent <br />we may be led, <br />like sheep to the slaughter.<br />~George Washington~<br />----------------------------------<br />And then second...my mind jumped right to my post about *Law of the Garbage Truck*<br />----------------------------------<br />So having said these things I can honestly say that I'm a passionate person and I don't believe anyone that has come to know me ever wondered where we stood..LOL I'm a sweet generous loving passionate opinionated lady. ;0) The opinions that I have I do not change midstream to fit the situation. I just can't do it..We either stand firmly on our foundation or get knocked down at every turn..and that comment *to me* has never been truer than the times we are living in right now.<br /><br />I have found that many millions of people in the USA are furious (me included) over the current state of the economy and with the current administration in Washington. Again this is *my* opinion only.<br /><br />The good news is that WE THE PEOPLE do have freedom of speech and the right to our own opinions. We should never hope for that to change (even though we have to hear things we'd rather not). We are all so different as you have said..in how we word things...the intent behind our words, etc....<br /><br />I have a wicked sense of humor most of the time so it takes someone that has a bit of a free spirit to stay around me for long...it seems there is a very small group of us that can dish it out and also receive it back without being hurt though.<br /><br />Even though I don't know which subject (religion or politics) led to you being attacked but those two topics seem to very passionate these days..more than ever..actually. I have my definite foundation of where I stand concerning both and love a good debate...unfortunately there are a lot of folks that don't know how to debate and be constructive so thus they scream and attack and accomplish nothing!! I leave comments concerning these issues at blogs that *lean my direction* as a manner of building information for the everyone to read and hopefully it can make a difference in their lives.<br /><br />I never get involved with the *good opinion of others* especially when they lean the opposite direction from me...that takes a personality that enjoys the screaming and accomplishing nothing...since that's most of what you see these days...<br /><br />I do like a debate though as it forces a person to search within themselves to hear themselves say *how they interpret things*....but what I'm seeing for the most part these days are a lot of people that don't really know the facts and are screaming. If you are gonna scream....atleast know the subject matter..LOL <br /><br />So, dear Betsy, stand your ground *firmly*, be who you are at all costs! Remember the Garbage Truck..hahaha<br /><br />For anyone that has read all of this comment...and interested in reading the *Law of the Garbage Truck* you can paste this link into your browser to go to it.<br /><br />-----------------------------------<br /><br />http://queenofdreamsz.blogspot.com/2009/09/affirmations-for-journey.html<br />-----------------------------------<br />Betsy...have a wonderful Monday!<br />Hugs to you, StephanieStephanie Suzanne Designshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17121430170088480348noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3915113069723845995.post-9783666368094861552009-09-14T15:19:04.272-05:002009-09-14T15:19:04.272-05:00Like you, I try to avoid controversial topics. I j...Like you, I try to avoid controversial topics. I just keep smiling!SmilingSallyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10479373067844173653noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3915113069723845995.post-78542999168968849222009-09-14T15:08:20.459-05:002009-09-14T15:08:20.459-05:00Just recently we hired new staff in one of our dep...Just recently we hired new staff in one of our departments. One day my boss asks me about my experience with and opinion of this new employee. Having been one of the managers before I retired, I felt that he wanted my objective evaluation, even though I was reluctant to say anything as I now only work part-time. I started with stating several positive character traits, but finished with giving concrete examples of several incidents that might not make this a person one who we wish to keep in our employs. <br /><br />I had been asked and would never have voiced my opinion otherwise. I was as kind as as could be, but my boss told me flat out that I had been 'judgmental' and he had not expected that of me.<br /><br />Now I'm asking myself the same question you asked, "When can I express my opinions????" Was he not being judgmental of my opinions? <br /><br />I'm fine with being a fence sitter when I truly don't know both sides of a story. I think another word for it is wisdom! I voice my opinion and am open to hear yours, because it adds so that the whole picture might become more clear. We all only know in part and my opinion can stand to have correction or more information sometimes. <br /><br />What I finally told my boss was that this is my opinion at present based on my experience and impression, and I would like nothing better than to be proven wrong! I have been known to be wrong before - once or twice in my life, LOL!!!!!!<br /><br />Keep up your amazing, joyful, encouraging, uplifting blog! And don't be fearful to express you opinions - they are valuable, considering your life-time experiences. I am blessed by both of you!<br />Love in HIM,<br />KarinKarinhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12953073381987950597noreply@blogger.com