Welcome to JOYFUL REFLECTIONS. Also welcome to MARCH!!!! My header picture this month is a photo I took of the pretty Crocus blooms in our yard... The Crocuses and Daffodils are the first signs of spring here in Tennessee. I am definitely ready for SPRING...

Thursday, January 15, 2009

Sorry Is...


I got this sweet but very sad picture (above) from a friend... It made me think about the word, SORRY. How many times a day do we/I/you use this word???? Sorry has all kinds of meanings:
--Grieved for the loss of some good; pained for some evil; feeling regret; -- now generally used to express light grief or affliction, but formerly often used to express deeper feeling.
--Melancholy; dismal; gloomy; mournful; (She is in a sorry mood today!)
--Poor; mean; worthless; (That is a sorry excuse.).


I can only speak for myself, but I know that I seem to constantly use the word.. I 'am' a pleaser --especially to my sweet husband, and whenever I think I've done (or do) something crazy or stupid, I apologize BIGTIME. "I'm sorry that I walk so slowly." "I am sorry that I complain about my aches and pains so much." I feel so sorry for you---having to put up with a moody female like me." Just think about it... I seem to apologize ALOT. Do you????


Then, there's always the problem when someone 'does' say "I'm Sorry" that makes one wonder if they really are sorry ---or whether they are just using words that mean nothing...???? An apology that means nothing is worse I think than no apology at all. Why is it that some people seem to apologize ALOT and others never seem to say "I'm Sorry"???? Maybe, saying "I'm Sorry" has a different meaning to some than it does to others. Maybe --some of the problem has to do with 'forgiveness' (which is another blog)!


All of these thoughts made me do some research on the word, SORRY. I read on www.brainyquote.com MANY different quotes from people using the word, sorry. It's interesting how the word has so many meanings and interpretations. If you want to know who said some of these quotes listed below, click HERE. It is interesting! See if you can guess which one of these quotes was said by Monica Lewinsky. (Har Har)


Sorry Quotations
--I don't like it, and I'm sorry I ever had anything to do with it.
--I can just tell you that I'm sorry for what happened, and I think people understand that.
--Love is never having to say you are sorry.
--Love in the real world means saying you're sorry 10 times a day.
--And I felt sorry, and I have felt bad about what happened.
--If love means never having to say you're sorry, then marriage means always having to say everything twice.
--All successful people these days seem to be neurotic. Perhaps we should stop being sorry for them and start being sorry for me - for being so confounded normal.
--There's no room in my life for feeling sorry for myself.
--You may be sorry that you spoke, sorry you stayed or went, sorry you won or lost, sorry so much was spent. But as you go through life, you'll find - you're never sorry you were kind.
--Grab a chance and you won't be sorry for a might-have-been.
--Most truths are so naked that people feel sorry for them and cover them up, at least a little bit.
--If you're going to do something tonight that you'll be sorry for tomorrow morning, sleep late.
--Affliction comes to us, not to make us sad but sober; not to make us sorry but wise.
--I can wholeheartedly apologize for not being at all sorry. And it really is the least I can do.
--Let us live so that when we come to die even the undertaker will be sorry.

41 comments:

Jayne said...

I am readily able to tell someone I am sorry if I feel I have hurt them, or my actions were perceived in some negative way. Interesting post Betsy. None of us should feel the need to apologize for being who we are or for things beyond our control.

Shirley Gonzalez-Day said...

I just found your blog and saw your beautiful photographs of bluebirds. We just put up three new bluebird boxes on our property because we have at least six pair that nest here. We are crossing our fingers that they will like their new spaces. From one bird lover to the other, I can't wait until the hummers return in March.

This Is My Blog - fishing guy said...

Betsy: It's good to say sorry only if you mean it.
My youngest grandson when small use to say sorr-sorr to get out of trouble. He was so darn cute you couldn't stay mad at him.

Mary said...

Good post. I think it is far better to say "I'm sorry" too often, then to not say it enough. Our minister said something recently about how as Christians we should always be the first to say we are sorry, even when we didn't do anything wrong. It's about healing relationships at all times. It's about love.

SmilingSally said...

Plenty to think about with today's post. I like the last line best.

Anonymous said...

A good post this morning Betsy to get us thinking. I am a "worry wart" and always wonder if I have done something to hurt someone. As I get older, I find it easier to just approach the person and ask, did I hurt you? Usually they have no idea what I'm talking about and so my mind is put at ease! Much simpler than worrying!!!

dot said...

I think Monica probably said the second one.
When I apologize for something trivial my husband always comes up with that John Wayne quote "Never apologize it's a sign of weakness". I always set him straight with "It takes a big man to apologize".

Busy Bee Suz said...

I don't think I use that word very much...really, I am trying to NOT be sorry for anything. My Mom always says sorry for everything....but I am sorry that I use so many dots......
:)

I Am Woody said...

I'm like you - a pleaser. So I say that I'm sorry all the time. Even for things that are not my fault, are completely out of my control. Even when I'm not really sorry!

Leedra said...

The pic makes me think of a small child that is being made to say he/she is sorry. It is so cute.

Leedra’s Photos For Fun
Photography By Leedra

Cedar ... said...

I do not believe that anyone should apologize for something that they didn't do. Acceptance of inappropriate guilt has done much to damage the self esteem of many people. However, you can always say you are sorry that the other person feels badly about something. That can be healing without taking on responsibility for something you did not do.

Day4plus said...

So sorry you feel that way. LOOLLLOOLLL!!!!!

Just joking. MB

Ruth's Photo Blog said...

Thanks for a thought provoking post.It is good to think a little deeper once in a while.
Blessings,Ruth

Deborah Godin said...

Such a simple word for a host of complex situations. Loved the humor in some of them!

Cicero Sings said...

Can't say I over use it ... just when needed. I like the gal that said she was sorry for using so many dots. I use a lot of dots too! Sometimes I edit some of them out.

Anonymous said...

AWWWWWWW!!! He's soooo cuuuuute!!! I love it - how can you resist that face????? I LOVE THIS PHOTO!!!!

Judy said...

I always liked the one about Love is Never Having to Say You're Sorry. I willingly apologize if I feel I have done something wrong or to hurt someone's feelings. Good post.

Tammy ~ Country Girl at Home ~ said...

Hi Betsy,

What a great thought provoking post. You are so right...the word sorry can be used in so many ways, meant and not meant. But I think I'd rather be known for saying it too much than not enough! :)

Have a great day, Betsy!

Hugs,
Tammy

Jessica said...

So much meaning for such a small word. Great post.

Unknown said...

You've been tagged girlie!!

The Birdlady said...

Love the puppy - never knew there was so much to be said for "sorry."

Unknown said...

What a great picture.

When someone tells me they are "sorry" I wonder if they are sorry for what they did, or sorry they were caught (I'm thinking of my kids, LOL) so the word "sorry" needs to be followed up with a change in behavior.

I used to get s frustrated by a former co worker who would tell me she was sorry for doing something, then do the same thing a day or two later.

Tina said...

Betsy,
Such an adorable picture..makes me think he is just being quite shy!!
Love this photo!

Shelley said...

I am quick to apologize if it's my fault - but if it's not, I do have a little bit of the "justice seeker" in me - wink, wink! Good post Betsy!

Susie said...

First of all I got to say that puppy is really cute!

Second I love all your pictures on your side bar.

Thirdly, saying sorry is a hard word to say. When I hurt my honey's feelings I will definitely apologize but girl is it hard to do!

I also scrolled down thru your posts to see what I have missed. I enjoyed all your woodpecker pictures. We have a red headed one just like yours that visits our birdbath frequently in the spring/summer.

Rose said...

Now, Betsy, this is an absolutely wonderful post! I must say I do hate it when people just say Oh, I'm sorry and you feel like they are just saying it and not meaning a word of it...and you are right. It might have to do with forgiving. I love the quotes...will look up who said them later. I really like the one that says 'if love means never having to say you're sorry, then marriage means always having to say everything twice.'

Great, great post.

Steffi said...

Hello Betsy,that is a cute photo of your sweet puppy!But it looks so sad!
Have a nice weekend!

ShabbyInTheCity said...

Before I forget...Royal is the typewriter brand :)
That doggie is so cute! I wonder what he'd done to be sorry for (I'll bet he was really just embarrassed for having been caught!

Jen said...

Yep, sometimes saying you're sorry turns into a habit and you say it before really thinking.

re: Monica. I think Bill was sorry that he got caught!

Betsy Banks Adams said...

Jayne--You are right.. If we do the best we can, we shouldn't have to apologize for being US... Great words of wisdom!!!

Shirley--Welcome!!! Glad you liked my bluebirds... They are the reason I got so interested in 'birding.' Now--I cannot wait 'til spring. WOW--if you have 3 bluebird boxes, you should see a bunch of them in the spring. Keep me posted!!!

Tom--AMEN to that... I think it's said too much when people don't mean it. Grandchildren are exempt--when it comes to getting upset with them!!! ha

Mary---I agree... I say it too much--and truly mean it. As many people have said on this blog, it's better to say it too much than not at all. I've known people who would never say it--or even think that they may have done something to hurt someone else. People--we're all different, aren't we?

Sally---What made me think in this blog was ALL of the different meanings for the word. Isn't that just amazing??? I like that last line also.. I want people to remember that I was a good person who cared about others.

Mildred-- I'm kinda a 'worry-wart' also... I wish I weren't--and could let things fly off of my shoulder more. But--then again, it takes us all being unique and different in order to make the world go round!!!

Dot--Monica said the 5th one in case anyone cares. She may be sorry but I'm sure that Bill was only sorry he was caught!!!.. Maybe that's a 'man thing' about being weak. That is SO wrong...We all need to be willing to apologize when needed.

Suzanne-- Hey, we have something in common... I use too many dots also!!!! ha ha.. I think it becomes habit when we say it too much... Most of the time, I'm sorry for things that I didn't do and should have--which is one of those other meanings. Can you believe so many meanings for that word????

Yes Woody---I think it becomes a habit... We 'pleasers' are more sensitive I think. I am always aware and concerned about others and their needs and feelings. Alot of people are not that way. This topic has become very interesting.

Leedra-- I thought that was the cutest picture --although that doggie looks so sad. Kids look at us like that---and make our hearts melt.. When they look like that, there's no reason for them to say a word!!!! Looks are everything!

Cedar--I agree with that completely. Nobody should apologize for something they did not do.. BUT--sometimes we don't know when we do something to hurt someone else... How do we handle that???? I like your answer as to how to help someone without taking the guilt on yourself. Great comment.

Oh MB---You are just too funny!!!! Too much Washington snow and rain, huh????? ha

Ruth--It really has turned out to be a thought-provoking post At first, I just thought it was interesting. But now--people are saying such great things about being sorry. It has turned out to be quite an interesting topic... Maybe we need more of these sometimes.

Deb--You are right... A simple little word has LOTS of meaning... But--like everything in life, it does also have its humor!!!!!

Cicero--Me too... I'm a DOT person and I also use alot of dashes... Maybe we should start a club. HA!!!! Should I do a blog on dots and dashes????? ha.. I don't even try to edit them out!

Tricia--Yes, he is a cutie for sure. AND just think!!! With that look, he doesn't even have to say "I'm sorry." NO words are needed!!!!!

Judy-- Remember that movie where they said that???? Wasn't it "Love Story" with Ryan O'Neal???? That was one of my fav's WAY back when!!!

Tammy---I really hadn't thought much about the word until I started this post. It is a complicated word, isn't it???? And each of us interpret it differently.. I'm like you. I'd rather say it than not.

Jessica---You are right.. There's tons of meanings to such a small word. I guess that makes it a BIG word, huh?

Darla----I did it!!!! Thank you (I think)... ha ha

Helen--That puppy is precious, isn't he??? I agree---when I started this post, I never thought that people would have so much to say about that word. A little word is now a BIG word!!!!

Fiona---That is true. Some people are SORRY they got caught. That's when 'sorry' becomes an ugly word. AND when someone says it and then turns around and makes the same mistake over and over, you know they don't mean it...

Tina--Yes, that puppy is adorable. As I said above in my comments, sometimes you don't need words.. Your face shows everything needed.

Shelley-- I agree that we shouldn't apologize for something we didn't do. However, sometimes we hurt someone's feelings and don't even know it. What happens then???? I guess I would apologize if I felt it was needed.

Susie-- I think that truly meaning it when you say it is HARD. BUT--too many times we just spout it out and don't really mean it. At that time, the word takes on a whole new meaning. Glad you got to see the woodpecker pictures. Missed you and glad you are back.

Thanks Rose. I never dreamed that there would be so much discussion about that tiny little word... Interesting, huh??? The quotes are interesting and it's also interesting to see who said them..

Steffi---How's the weather in Germany??? We're having a huge FREEZE here in the states. Yes, that picture of the puppy does look sad.

Phyllis---A Royal, huh??? I think we had one of them at one time also!!! ha... That doggie has the sweetest, sad look on his face. No words were needed. Forgiveness happens immediately --with a look like that!!!! Wish more humans were that honest!!!!! ha

Jen---HA HA---that is exactly what Bill Clinton is sorry about.... GADS--I cannot stand him!!!! I agree that it does become a habit---and when that happens, does one really meant it?????

Connie said...

Interesting post, Betsy. There are so many ways that "I'm sorry" can be interpreted.

Betsy Banks Adams said...

You are right, Daisy... When I wrote this post, I had no idea there would be so many thoughts on it!!!!

Loran said...

You have so many good posts that it's hard to comment on all of them!

I was particularly touched by the one about the picture posted by the health retreat. Love the woodpeckers and the thoughts about being sorry as well.

And yes, getting older is the pits.

Betsy Banks Adams said...

Hi MM, Glad you got to check out several of my blogs. The weight issue is really 'my' big issue--as you can tell. And I do love the woodpeckers. Take care and have a great day. It's 1 degree here right now. Brrrrr

Breathing In Grace said...

WOW!! This is so me. I've said for years that I feel sorry even if the weather is bad for something you're wanting to do..I've always been that way. I think it has a lot to do with our upbringing!!! You said that you and George sometimes eat at Cracker Barrel on SP Pike...that's not too far from us!! Small world!!!

Anonymous said...

I am a pleaser too and always saying sorry...interesting post Betsy..

Betsy Banks Adams said...

Yes Deb---we go through the St.Plains area on our way to the beach. AND--I have a nephew who lives in Kingsport, so we meet sometimes at CB for lunch!!!! Small world for sure!!!!

Thanks Michelle. It did turn out to be quite interesting. We all are different--and that is what makes life interesting.

Jackie said...

I am in total agreement about saying you're sorry when you've done something wrong, or possibly when someone has perceived that you've done something wrong, like I'm sorry I gave you that impression. Having said that, specifically in boyfriend/girlfriend relationships, I always tell my daughter to beware of a person (a man in her case) who gives a good apology. That probably just means they've had a lot of practice and haven't learned from it!!! lol

Betsy Banks Adams said...

Great thoughts Jackie... Yes, it's kinda like Drew Peterson (the guy who killed all of this wives--so we think). Now he has a NEW gal.. What in the heck is she thinking???? I'm sure he told her all kinds of 'sorry' stories to make her believe him. GADS!!!!

Karin said...

I LOVE your puppy dog picture! All would be forgiven instantly if he looked at me with those big, brown eyes!

I recall a time when I spoke truth into someone's life in a fairly loud voice. The next day I felt to convicted to apologize. When I spoke to her, she accepted the apology and said that she was glad 'I took everything back.' That's when I spoke very gently, lovingly and explained, that I had not taken anything back that I had said, I was simply very sorry that I had spoken in frustration and nervousness, instead of conveying to her the truth that she needed to hear. She had a lot of thinking to do, but definitely improved her behaviors after taking my comments to heart. We're still related and have a greater appreciation for what that circumstance taught us.

If I need to apologize I usually start with "Please forgive me for...."

Hubby hates apologizing so he does not offend with his words or actions. He doesn't get angry, use hurtful words, or has ever raised his voice. The man is a godly man and very self-controlled. Blows me away!

Betsy Banks Adams said...

Karin, My hubby is similar to yours. He's so easy-going, it's just amazing. Maybe we just have too much 'girl' in us!!! Ya think???? ha